An Angel born Sleeping...

In Loving Memory of our Little Angel

You were born silent, 
perfect and beautiful. 
still loved. still missed.
still remembered. Everyday. 

You came to us unexpectedly but was never unwanted.

Full of triumphs and overwhelming feelings but shrouded with unknown fears.

Nevertheless, you are a blessing from heaven above and you were so loved and anticipated.

Each day and night, I nurtured you with love and happiness while battling with fears and worries.

God knows how much you are loved and wanted. 

You were so precious little one that I could no longer wait, to feel you in my arms and showered you with so much love.

Everything was so perfect then until you decided to stop your heart from beating.  

I could not contain how I felt as I was so wrecked and fell down hard the moment I saw you born sleeping. 

How I wish I could cuddle you and hug you so tight and kiss your forehead and say, My son, I am sorry that you have to feel what I feel at these hard times and despair. I could not believe, could not fathom, hoping everything was just a bad dream and wish it will come to an end.

Waking up each day without you in my arms was so hard.

Wishing to go back time and undone what I have done. 

It breaks my heart in silence thinking of not able to hear you cry, see you smile, see you crawl, hear your first word and watch you grow. 

My world turned upside down as I can no longer nurture you with mother's love as you have gone long before.

There were no days and nights I longed for your touch, wishing you are here by my side, comfort you with mother's touch each time you cry. 

But here I am, with never ending tears of agony. 
Thinking of the life without you will never be the same.

Hoping and praying that time will heal the pain and when that day will come your memory will bring back the smile in my face again. 

My Dearest Son, I may not carry you in my ARMS but I will forever carry you in my HEART. 

Remember that Mommy LOVES you so much... 

Sleep well, My Son..